News and Views

August 11, 2005
Parents Get Racist Inquiries About Adopted Kids

Questions like “Is she your real daughter?” or "Does she cry in Korean?" are not uncommon when a parent and child with different color eyes or ethnic backgrounds are minding their own business in public. Such seemingly harmless questions are, in fact, racist and insensitive, distinctively trying to magnify differences as opposed to respecting and celebrating them. Where are questions like "wow, your daughter is beautiful! How old is she?" This is a harmless question that does not attack someone's race or background and does not single out a parent and child's relationship. It's tough enough already what many parents and children go through to find one another, so the blatantly racist and inconsiderate questions only hinder the path towards celebrating diversity and respecting people from all cultures and abilities. These questions should not be tolerated and adoption should not fall victim to being categorized as another "ism" where "it" becomes a "problematic" area that waits to be addressed but is not. And in the meantime, what are ways to counter these questions?

Read more at: Star Tribune