Five Questions with Mardie Caldwell

(View Biography)

We would like to thank Mardie for answering your questions. While there is some positive change in adoption-awareness, we know there is a long way to go! People like Mardie—and all of you are instrumental in 'carrying the flag' in support of all families, no matter how they are formed or what they look like. When we truly eliminate the biases the 'non-traditional families' face we will truly have moved a step closer to a world where respect and celebrations of cultures, choices and 'abilities' is the rule, rather than the exception.

Thanks, Mardie for making us feel good about our progress!

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1. In your view what are the benefits and challenges of open adoption?

I think open adoption benefits the entire triad of most adoptions as it provides knowledge for the child on why they were adopted and where their biological roots lie. It helps the adoptive parents because they have an understanding of the child’s medical and social history. It assists in ways that can help children through their lifetime that closed adoption never offers.

For the birth family, open adoption provides an opportunity to choose the family that will raise their child based on the environment, lifestyle and values that are important to them.

Overall, it leaves all members feeling more at peace having this knowledge instead of always wondering and questioning about the whys, whos and whats - especially for the adoptee. You can go to www.openadoption.com for more information.

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2. With all of the scams on the Web, is using the internet to facilitate family formation practical and/or safe?

I think that the internet is here to stay and young women and prospective adoptive parents are turning to the internet for adoption information as they do with anything else in their life. As with anything, one must be cautious when giving out information and adoption is no different.

The benefits of using the internet is that a birth family is able to find just the right family for their child and the adoptive parents do not have to wait 5 to 7 years to adopt by being able to reach out over state lines to organizations that can help them sooner. As little as 20 years ago, families were restricted to their own home state and long waiting lists.

As mentioned in my book, AdoptingOnline.com there are red flags for the adoptive parents, birth parents and adoption professionals to watch for in any adoption. As with anything, you need to be wise with your decisions and not just make decisions with your heart. In my book AdoptingOnline.com I have devoted Chapter 11 to this topic to help prevent any setbacks in your adoption.

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3. The foster-care system in the US is supposed to be color-blind when placing children in families. Is this really true?

Unfortunately, many of the foster care programs in the US have been slow to update their policies in the best interest of the children. Until foster care agencies, both private and public, begin to focus on placing children in permanent adoptive family homes with the children’s best needs in place, regardless of race, this will continue to be a challenge where the children are the ones that suffer.

There are thousands of waiting adoptive parents nationwide wanting to adopt new family members, regardless of race. It’s important that we continue to encourage what is best for the children and long term foster care is never the answer.

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4. How can we fight negative adoption stereotypes in the media?

I believe this is beginning to change already as you see more celebrities and high profile families adopt. Adoption is already taking an upward swing to help educate the general public on how adoption has changed and is changing in the 21st century for the better.

As adoption awareness and education in our schools increase, from elementary school through college, we will see more families formed through adoption in a positive light. Remember that every day hundreds of adoptions are finalized successfully, but the media will take 1 out of 10,000 cases and focus on that one negative case as it’s what sells magazines, news stories and tabloids.

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5. What is the one piece of advice you would give to: birthparents; parents and children of adoption?

Research. When looking at adoption, you need to do your research and get information about the people assisting you in your adoption. Look at their motives and what their interest is in the adoption process.

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Our next featured guest is Tiffany Morrison, owner of Mix It Up, a new line of greeting cards for interracial couples and multiracial consumers (www.Mix-It-Up.net).